Today’s You are not alone post is we’re interviewing Maz from Caffeine and Fairydust. I’ve had the pleasure of actually meeting this lovely lady a few times and she’s awesome, one of those stunning people who put on such a great show you would never think she’d be on one of my you are not alone posts. Lots of strength x
What makes you so special?
Well, besides the fact that I am fucking fabulous… just kidding. Clinically – I have Bipolar disorder, Schizoaffective disorder, Depression and Chronic Insomnia
When were you diagnosed?
I have always had it, but growing up in a small town meant that I was subjected to some pretty awful psychologists who thought it was all in my head. I was properly diagnosed in 2009 by a psychiatrist who specialized in Bipolar disorder. He has been an tremendous source of support, information and comfort in the past couple of years.
Do you take anything for it?
I used to, but after endless trials and finally finding the combination that worked – we realized that it was affecting my memory really badly. I pretty much do not remember anything from the start of 2010 to mid 2011. Blank. With the constant help and support from my psychiatrist I stopped taking my medication on the condition that I would be closely monitored for the rest of my life. I am still on Valium to help with my Anxiety and every now and then I take sleeping tablets. I pretty much go through a bottle of rescue remedy a day – I literally eat them like sweets as I find they take the edge off – not much, but enough.
Any special coping mechanisms?
Meditation, healthy diet, music and daydreaming. I also have some pretty severe OCD’s that help me feel in control.
What does the number 9 smell like?
What colour is Tuesday?
If you could give someone out there ANY advice, what would it be?
• Embrace and accept the illness.
• Take it seriously – It is sneaky and dangerous if you don’t watch it all of the time.
• You need a great support system – besides the fact that you have someone to talk to, they can also help you recognize when you might be experiencing a depressive or manic episode.
• Be kind to yourself – you cannot be too hard on yourself. “You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”
• Having a routine really helps
• Realize that most things other people say are not meant to hurt you
• You are not your illness. You have an individual story to tell. You have a name, a history, a personality. Staying yourself is part of the battle.
What saying get’s you through most days?
“It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.”
Tea or Coffee?
Coffee od course – not the best choice when you have Insomnia or Anxiety… or Manic episodes for that matter – but wehoooo CAFFEINE!
Draw a picture of your “issue” (or google it)…