At long last I can officially say it and I can’t be more excited or scared shitless.
Fysh and I have had this dream of buying a van and living out of it for years now, and then we met The Person and hey guess what, he has the same dream!
Unfortunately I can’t say we’re moving into said van just yet, finances and all, but we are about to take our first giant leap towards it. EEP
While for some the whole moving to another house thing might not seem like a giant leap for most people for us it’s such a huge scary milestone. My whole life I have moved every two years max and yet I have been in this particular house for 8 years. 8 freaking years!!! It’s basically the only home Fysh knows but we need to move. I have grown moss on my back from being this stagnant. I basically lost myself, I’ve been stuck and that’s affected everything.
It’s been helpful living here though, I used to make a decent living, we could easily get through the months but then I guess the “stuck” got to me and eh, I don’t know. The helpful part is that I have been able to lease out two of the rooms in the house which amounts to the rent being covered so we’ve been able to get by that way. But the problem is that when I moved in here I was 22 and no landlord would sign a lease with me because I was a single mom, my dad was living and working in Mozambique and needed a place to store his stuff and basically have a base when he had to come back and renew his visa’s.
It was great for the first 3 years or so but he’s been here more and more with longer stays and it’s literally felt like I am living with my dad instead of him staying with me. I get made to feel like a child that can’t do anything and that really affects everything else that I do because it’s such a negative feeling. Also, your father trying to parent your child is just not something that works well. Particularly when he’s from a whole different era. You learn from your parents and you build from that, avoiding the mistakes they made, but he doesn’t see it that way.
The Person has had a massive influence the past few years and he’s really helped me grow as a person which I am so grateful for. What I love most is that he didn’t come in and fix everything, instead he tied a string around all the broken pieces so that they don’t fall completely apart while I learn to fix it myself. And slowly slowly my confidence has been coming back. I’m not there yet, are we ever? But I’m feeling like I can actually maybe accomplish things again. I mean look at me, I’m working to getting a degree! That in itself was a moerse gedoente.
And with that, we are about to take this giant leap.
We are moving out of the city and into the countryside. Okay so it isn’t really the countryside as such but we are outside of Stellenbosch nestled between wine farms and fresh air and occasionally the one farmers cows get loose and you end up having coffee with them mooing next to the fence. It’s freaking amazing.
There are new obstacles though, I’ll be paying rent again for the first time in a long time and while that scares me because it’s more than I make right now I know this whole endeavor is the right step because I just feel it in my soul that when I am there, surrounded by hippies and positive people I will find my groove again and I will be able to build up everything stronger than before. This isn’t just for me, this is for the Fyshness as well, he needs the positivity just as much as I do.
We are I am scared out of my wits.
But this is one step closer to our van-life dreams.
Oh, and if you are keen and in the Cape Town area I will be selling off a whole bunch of stuff that’s going to go towards helping us get through at least a month or two of rent while we build ourselves up. And if you aren’t in Cape Town then you can go have a look at my book list here of books I am parting with which in turn pays for second semester of studies! Or you can order an illustration. Either or, we don’t want free stuff, we want to work for it, but I would appreciate the helping hand of letting us earn it if that makes any sense.
And for those who still follow us despite the absence and mood swings.
We ♥ you crazy weirdos